Friday, January 8, 2010

Research mission critique #1 - the mathematics of love

Herewith the promised critique from last night's research mission. And a fruitful mission it was. 
Our first hit came approximately 15 minutes after touchdown at our chosen bar. Let's call him 'Specimen A'. 
Quite a casual approach but engaging. Warm. Humorous. Non-threatening. And using the increasingly popular 'wingman' (or in this case 'wing-woman') technique of being out with a mate and together nonchalantly easing into a group conversation. This gives you a more confident success ratio than the one-on-one hit which has a higher degree of difficulty.
Speciman A was out with his 'sister' and has a million pick-up lines, most of them unprintable here. According to 'sister', who experienced it first hand, his default line goes something like this: Hides a tiny piece of paper fluff in his hand, approaches his target with a friendly smile and says "Excuse me, I'm sorry but you have something in your hair and it's been distracting me all night, let me get that for you", as he gently tugs a strand of hair behind her ear and gallantly retrieves said fluff from his own hand.
Sitting down next to us in our preyground, his lure of choice was: Leans in and points to an awkward looking couple across the bar. "Look at their body language. Do you think they're on a first date?" Yeah - points for that. Engaged us all in the conversation, which inevitably took a comedic turn and gave our new posse of four an excuse to check out everyone in the bar. Not bad Specimen A.
Then there was the couple on an arranged date at the table near us. She was sitting opposite her would-be suitor, staring numbly past his left ear while his fingers tapped and danced inexhaustibly across his iPhone. In a final, desperate attempt to attract his attention she slid sideways, clutched the arm of the 55-year-old man next to her and nestled into his chest. The man next to her did not object, in fact he settled in contentedly between her and his wife, judging by the smile creeping onto his face, conjuring up a happy ending for their story.
But the most unusual accessory award goes to our new friend the Mathinator for his bizarre appendage. He walked into the bar gently cosseting a grey, red and white polyhedron in his hands. Yes - polyhedron - "a geometric solid with flat faces and solid edges" according to Wikipedia.
It was a gift from his maths-teacher girlfriend. She made it especially for him - the most impressively geeky but sweet romantic gesture of the evening. Clearly, in the mathematics of love 1 + 1 = oneness for these two. ;)

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